a tip for texbook cover designers.

Don't ever feature a smiling kid on the cover.
Actually, avoid any pictures of people on it.

Why?
First, let me ask you.
Do you like studying? 

Your answer is undoubtedly a strong NO. The truth: Everybody hates studying.
And anyone who says they enjoy it, is either...
a) Trying to sound smart
b) Someone who has absolutely no life

Moving on, please imagine this situation.
It's almost 12 in the morning, and you have a big test tomorrow. You forgot about it, and suddenly realized that the test WAS TOMORROW.
You freak out.
So, you sit down at your desk. And take a few deep breaths.
And start to study.
You have your glasses on like a good kid, perfectly sharpened #2 pencil in hand, and textbook flipped open on your desk.
For the first hour everything is going fine. You're cramming Latin words in your head, memorizing statistics, and reciting all the countries in the Northern Hemisphere like a hyperactive-overdosed-on-coffee machine.
But then, suddenly you snap. It might be caused from the overload of caffeine in your bloodstream, one complicated equation, or a entire page of nonstop text. 
You're pissed off.

So you look around for someone or something to take your anger out at.
You look for your parents, but they're already dreaming blissful dreams of their adorable child graduating from Harvard and curing cancer.
You look in the fridge, but close it because there's nothing to eat.
You look at your fish, then think about the salmon you ate for dinner and feel bad for your sorry little goldfish swimming in your sorry little tank.
There's nothing you can do with your anger.

Then you look at your textbook. You close it angrily and stare at the awful thing that is causing so much pain in misery in your life.

Note: I have nothing against the actual content of this. Just the cover. (:

Your eyes focus on the smiling face on the cover.
Suddenly, you're consumed by rage directed at the person on it.

WHY ARE YOU HAPPY? ARE YOU HAPPY AT MY MISERY? WELL YOU'VE GOT WHAT YOU WANTED YOU AWFUL PERSON!

All common sense have flown from your mind, and you end up sitting at your desk filled with uncontrollable hate at this person on your textbook.

What the person did was unforgivable. Smile at your pain? INTOLERABLE.
You resolve to hunt him/her down.
You will not be calm until he/she suffers the same torture that you did.

-----------

So, textbook designers, please don't put people on your covers.
Do you need an example?

This is probably the MOST straightforward cover I have ever seen. And it works. Kudos to Sparknotes.


So for safety of yourself and others, do not put people on your covers. Thank you. <3 Fi

singing toothbrushes.

Some people associate different songs with different memories at various points of their lives.
You might have a special song you relate to camp. Or your ex. Or your best friend who moved to Russia two years ago. Or your pet rabbit.

But I'm not one of those people who do that. But there's only one song that sticks out.
And that is "Walk Away" by Kelly Clarkson. Random, right?
No. That was the song that was played by my singing toothbrush I got when I was around eight. It was when they were super popular, and everyone had them. Every time you brushed your teeth, it would play the song programmed into the toothbrush and how loud it was depends on hard you pressed down.

So I saw an ad in some magazine, and I was immediately consumed by this desire to get one of those. I knew the only way I would get my parents to buy me this amazing thing was if I used my current Disney Princess themed one until the blue indicators wore out.

So I brushed.
And brushed.
And brushed.
I brushed eleven times a day.
I. Wanted. A. Singing. Toothbrush.

Finally, my parents noticed my new fanatic wear-out-my-current-toothbrush attitude. Even though they were delighted to see their daughter finally caring about her teeth, they were slightly worried.

So they decided to fulfill my dream and buy me one. It was a random grab--one-off-the-shelf-and-pay-and-leave choice.
And the song was Walk Away by Kelly Clarkson.

Sure, the experience was amazing the first few times.
Each time I brushed, my pink brush would blast the song.
I loved it.

But then, a few hundred times later, the song started getting old. I knew all the lyrics. I didn't want to hear the same song, with the same tune, every single morning.

Now whenever I hear that song, I want to throw something at a wall. No, seriously.

I reccommend you don't buy them, unless if you really, really, really love the song you're getting. <3 Fi