Tuesday, December 6, 2011

a post about friends.

I have two really good childhood friends. Their names are Carl and Benny.
And we're really, really, really close.
At least, we WERE close.
We were always together throughout middle school and for a part of high school.
We would talk about Lord of the Rings, Star Wars and we all had common interests.
But lately, we just haven't seen each other. None of us has made an effort to make contact either.

Carl is a huge drama geek. He's the one that I mainly want to talk about.
He's an amazing person. He really is.
But it's getting difficult to have a conversation with him. We used to be able to talk hours and hours on end about absolutely everything and nothing at all. We made each other laugh, and we made each other mad too, but we always managed to tough it out together, no matter what happened.

Now when I see him, I have trouble making small talk, simply because I haven't seen him in so long.
And I never have trouble with small talk. I might not be good at a lot of things, but little, unimportant discussions is something I'm actually good at doing.

And now it's so awkward.
I mean, we both knew almost everything about each other.
I know that he idolizes Dwight from The Office and can quote anything from the show, especially when it involved Jim's pranks.
There was one time when I correctly named every shirt he owned, just because we were around each other so much.
If he was in front of me, I could tell if it was Carl or not because I knew the way that he walked.

Now when I see him, wearing a shirt I've never seen before, which is normally a reference to something I've never heard of, it's really weird.
I can't even converse properly with him, which used to be a given.
It's unsettling.

I need to work on communicating with him more. Maybe that would fix this.
Or maybe not.
We're both really awkward people.

7 comments:

Muhammad Israr said...

and i have a friend who is called princess fiona or lady fiona and i thought maybe she changed her name and i clicked and wow i found another beautiful blog :)

Anna said...

I completely know what you mean. I used to have a best friend and we were so close we would call each other "cinnamon" and "paprika" for no reason. After a while, separation starts to get in the way of the friendship and you slowly drift apart. It hurts, but I think you can get it back up again. :)

Wow, this pep talk is severely lacking in pep. :|

Fang said...

Oh God you're making me nervous.
Exams this year, and we'll all go our separate ways after that. We should try our best to maintain regular contact.

But I'm sure this is something you can overcome. Call each other up, ask for a date when all of you can hang out. Do something fun!

It'sJodie-Ann,Bro. said...

I know what you mean. I used to be best friends with this girl named Angela. Since KINDERGARTEN! And now, we don't even talk. Just hey, what's up?
It's horrible.

Rui C. said...

The relationship between a male and a female is difficult to begin with. On top of that you have a friendship to worry about. I've been down that path, it's a part of our social development to go down that path.

Something that may help is to not think of him as the Carl you used know because in reality he is not. Time passes and we are constantly changing. It seemed great before because you two were changing together. But now you've both changed apart. Understand that he branched from the Carl you used to know and embrace him as a more developed human being.

It's easy to wish for everything to go back to the way they were, but it is unhealthy to wish for such a thing because that would deny the fact that you two made any additions to your characters at all. We are constantly changing and growing, we can only meet old friends as new people whom we once knew from the past and establish something new, we can not bring back the past.

A part of this rant is a projection of my own relationships. Forgive me.

Fiona said...

Muhammad Israr: Thank you, welcome to my blog. (:

Anna: That sounds exactly like my situation! And your pep talk was very peppy, just not in the standard pep-talk way. I hope that makes sense.
Basically, I'm glad that you said that. It makes me feel better.

Fang: I will try to do that. Thank you!

Jodie-Ann: I guess it's still good that still talk. Look on the bright side!
Maybe you could try to establish some more communication? (:

Rui: No, don't apologize! That was very helpful and interesting.
I think that you make a good point. Getting hung over old relationships is really not productive, and instead of wanting what I used to have, I should appreciate what I have right now, at this moment.
Thank you for this, it made me situation in a new, more positive way.

Rui C. said...

^.^

t(^.^t)