cats and classical music.

A few days ago, I was walking to our town library.
Whenever I take a walk, I think about everything and absolutely nothing at all. My thinking process is basically me making small talk with myself.
And I realized that I changed a lot over the last few years.

I think the biggest change is that I've started to really appreciate classical music. I used to to think that it was really boring and reserved for old people, but then I joined an intense wind ensemble. Never in my life have I been around people who appreciated music quite like they did.
I was swept along with this huge classical-music current and started to listen to it.

I showed a recording that I really liked to one of my old friends. I can't quite remember which one it was, but I thought it was fascinating. He laughed and said that I was being brainwashed.
And I don't know if that was directed as an insult, but that really hit home.

I'm not ashamed of listening to classical music.
I just don't know if it's something I should openly share or not. I know that most people in my school don't even think about it as a type of "good" music and I'm really not up the challenge of trying to argue against years upon years of teenage culture.

...I'm not really sure where I'm going with this.
Maybe I'm trying to say that I'm trying to figure out what things I should share with others and what I shouldn't.
But then again, I really don't want to put a censor on my words.
I think that if someone wants to listen to me, they should have to deal with the fact that I do nerdy things.

This post has just turned into a trainwreck of conflicting thoughts, so I'm going to end it before my writing morphs into something about goats or whatever.

It's way too late but I accidentally had coffee an hour ago.
I'm basically fueled on caffeine with nothing to do.
I could either write a blog post or watch videos of cats, which I will probably do once I publish this.
Of course, I could study, but it's Friday and I never do work on Friday. I'm more of a cram-on-Sunday-night type of person.

And while I'm on this tangent, I'd like to let you know that I learned to juggle.
I found three juggling balls under my bed and I basically learned to juggle them when I should have been writing a History essay.

I really need to work on my time management.

skinny.

I hate the need to be skinny.
I hate how people believe that in order to be pretty, you have to be morbidly underweight.
I hate it.

A few hundred years ago, being overweight was considered attractive. 
It was a sign that you had enough money to feed yourself.
Which isn't a problem now, so now the image of "pretty" is a skinny girl with thin legs and arms. 

Being too skinny makes people look scrawny, weak and unhealthy.
The reason why anyone would willingly choose to look like that, I have no idea.

The main thing I don't get is someone losing drastic amounts of weight to impress someone.
As in starving themselves to get a boy to look at her.
Why would anyone do that?
If you can't love yourself, how can you expect somebody else to?

I know that in your eyes, I'm probably just another teenager prattling on and on about my various beliefs and convictions.
But this is a topic something I will never change my mind on.

I understand that anorexia and other eating disorders are serious topics.
But I think that if you have the confidence in yourself, you can prevent these things from happening. You need to have the mental strength to ignore other people telling you what to do and what you should look like.

But weight loss can be healthy.
My dad is about sixty pounds overweight, and our family is worried about his health.
So we're trying to get him to eat healthier and we signed him up for a gym membership. This way, he can lose those pounds without starving himself.

My main point is that you shouldn't obsessively worry about your body image. Don't ever harm yourself in order to be what you think is perfect.
Because it's not worth it.

I'm 5'5, and I weigh 127 pounds.
I'm not underweight, nor am I overweight.
I'm happy about who I am, and I don't obsess over every bit of food I put in my mouth.
I no longer care how big my butt looks or how fat my thighs are.
I'm able to indulge on a bag of chips or an ice cream sundae without beating myself over it.
Because if someone chooses not to talk to me because of my size, then that person wouldn't be worth my time anyway.
And that person wouldn't be worth yours either.

impending doom.

One word. FINALS. 
I think I might cry.

I've been procrastinating all year, somehow hoping that if I closed my eyes long enough they would go away.
Well, they haven't.

And I know that I have to pass all my classes or else I won't get accepted to a good college and then I won't get accepted into a good law school and I'll end up flipping hamburgers at McDonald's until I die a miserable death.
So in other words, I'm screwed.

And instead of a written English final this year, the department decided to something a little "different". The concept is that we research an artist and then create a piece with the artist's stylistic traits.
Which means that I have paint a picture in order to pass English.

So today, I did some research and chose Kandinsky. He's basically this guy who quit law school to paint and eventually married his cousin. 
I picked him because he did abstract art which mainly consisted of circles.
He also used oil paints.

We're supposed to use the same materials our artists used to make things more realistic.
I wanted to use my Crayola washable paint from fifth grade, but when I asked if I could use it, my teacher gave me the stink eye.
And I assumed that equated to a no.

Which means I have to go out and buy some expensive canvas and then go buy some more expensive oil paints and then go buy some expensive paintbrush.
And then I have to go home and then draw some circles and hope it looks like a masterpiece.
And knowing my artistic ability, it won't.

Also, because of finals I won't be posting as much as I've used to.
And I'll probably be too busy oil painting circles to get on the computer anyway.

But if it doesn't turn out too bad, I'll take a picture of it and post it here. So you can enjoy my hard work.
You're welcome.

breakfast foods.

I seriously don't understand why it's socially unacceptable to eat ice cream for breakfast, but it's fine for people to have waffles doused in syrup and powdered sugar.
Breakfast is a meal in which you consume so you are not hungry until lunch.
Why does it matter if I want to have cold pizza?
And if I want to have a turkey sandwich with tomatoes and lettuce, I should be able to.

It's not gross.
I'm just filling my belly.
Why does it bother you if I choose to eat something a few hours before the time that you deem acceptable?
I'm just being flexible.

If there are leftovers that need to be eaten, I will will eat them before they spoil.
Therefore I am reducing waste.
Therefore, eating any food for breakfast is practical.
And therefore it is superior than eating solely "breakfast foods".

So there. I win.

thinking for yourself.

I can't stand people who incapable of forming their own opinions.

Whenever I have a conversation with someone like that, I get this overwhelming sense that I'm talking to myself.

Me: Do you watch The Office?
Human: Yeah! 
Me: You know the new guy? Will Ferell? I don't think he'll be as good as Steve Carell.
Human: I agree totally!

30 minutes later: 
Another Human: My god, I LOVE the new guy on The Office!
Human: I know right? Isn't he awesome?
Me: o.O

Please have your own ideas on things.
Going with the general opinion doesn't make you seem informed. It makes you look like a follower who doesn't know any better.

I would rather have talk to a person who has radically different views than me, than someone who agrees with everything I say.
It gets tedious after a while. 

dear female celebrities,

If you wear a proper top that covers your chest, people will still like your music.
And modeling for photos with only a bra on won't make people like your movie more.

So please.
Wear more clothing.

some people just shouldn't write books.

You've probably heard of the reality TV show Jersey Shore.  If you haven't, it's 45 minutes of watching spray-tanned teenagers yelling, hooking up, going to the gym, and partying.

And now a star member of this show has written a book.
Snooki's book "A Shore Thing" was released on Jan. 4, 2011.
That's ridiculous.

From what I read on Amazon, it's about this girl and her cousin, who go to Jersey Shore for the summer. They both meet boys and have drama and then everything works out. The end.

It's hard to make your writing reality.
JK Rowling wrote the first words of Harry Potter on a dinner napkin.
Stephen King had to use multiple pen names to get his books published. 

I think that books should be meaningful.
They should have depth and at least have a message in it.
But then Snooki rolls on in, and produces a shiny book with her face on the cover.

That's just...
I can't even put the proper words to describe what I'm feeling right now.
Ugh.
Stop Snooki.
Just stop.